How Clean is Your House... ?

Who said that our current House of Representatives doesn't know what they're doing? Well you, sir or madam, should be embarrassed at how wrong you are. That's right, our right-wing nut job Republican controlled House has proven that they are, in fact, forward thinkers!

"Whatever could you be referring to, Frau?" I can hear you asking. Sure I've bugged your place, but whatever, I got the Patriot Act on my side, fuckin' Commie!

Am I talking about how they have resolved the Heathcare Problem? Nope.

Am I referring to how they have fixed the housing market saving thousands of American's from losing their homes? Pish-posh.

Maybe I talking about how they have restructured the tax burden and not only saving the disappearing middle class but providing much needed assistance to the poor? Even Better!

Our House of Representatives has decided to classify Pizza as a vegetable! HUZZAH! Insert blasts of confetti cannons here! I mean really, who doesn't love pizza? Everyone loves pizza! This fat kid loves pizza!

Now some of you hippie liberal nay-sayers may counter with the argument that the house only pushed this through because they're in the back pockets of the American Frozen Food Institute, a group who counts Schwan Food Company amongst its members, and they know pizza! They've been serving it up to schools across America since the 70's. So clearly there is no personal interest there. But I digress...

Here is why its brilliant. Now that pizza is a vegetable, I am now selling the official "Frau Bella's Pizza Seeds" [patent pending]! Guaranteed to grow fresh delicious pizza plants in your own backyard!

So this is your chance, dear reader, to get in on the ground floor. All you have to do is send me 100 bucks for the opportunity to sell these fantastic seeds! Plus the cost of the seeds of course. Here is the best part, once you sign up, all you have to do it recruit 10 more people to sell the seeds, and you can sit back and watch the money roll in! Hello, job creation!

Like I said, now is the time to get in. I am already working on new strains of the Pizza Plant. Right now we only have the "Little Caesar" Plant, but within the next week, we should have the "Papa John" and we are hoping to have the "Pizza Hut" in two months time. 

Holla'!