It was a
hot muggy afternoon yesterday, so I decided that I was going to get myself a
nice cold Blended Vanilla Ultimate down at the Coffee Bean. You know
how much I love my Coffee Bean [and that's not just a euphemism for my clitoris, but they both give me life]!
I
roll up and find a huge line, apparently I wasn't the only one with the
idea, but whatev's, I'm a patient gal. I pull out my phone and I'm
flipping through my Scruff profile [don't judge, you tell me a better
way to get random dudes to send you pictures of their junk, I know they
ain't into me, but a girl likes to window shop, amirite? My pseudonym is Herr Bello, and on Scruff I'm 8 1/2 inches, uncut, like everyone else, just sayin'] when some janky woman with an expensive weave
walks up and cuts in line.
"Hey, Steven Tyler," I yell ,"no cuts!"
"Excuse me, you cissy bitch?" Caitlyn Jenner turns and says.
"I said 'no cuts,' Trannysaurus Rex!"
"You can't say the "T" word, its derogatory."
"Oh, and you can call me a sissy?" I protest.
"I called you a cissy, as in cis-gender," she says contemptuously.
"What the eff is that bull-s?"
"You dum-dum, 'cis' is Latin for "on this side of." It means that you are biologically the same gender that you identify with."
"Hmm,
you know, you are right, it was totally insensitive of me to use the tranny word. I need to
me more aware of the language I use, and be more thoughtful with the
words that I choose. For that, I apologize," I said with a smile and
opened my arms to offer her a hug as a peace offering in my moment of
clarity. I truly understood the plight of transgender people and the
struggle they have to deal with everyday. Caitlyn came in and we embraced in a powerful
moment of true connection. "I promise that I will treat you no differently than I treat any one else. I will treat you just as I treat any sister," I added, then I shoved her to the back of the line and
yelled, "no cuts, cunt-face."
Caitlyn stumbled to the back of the line, turned, and mouthed the words "thank you."
No comments:
Post a Comment